Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Almost Christmas....

and I still have so much sewing to do!  My life events have been consuming my time and energy and Karah is sick (Tessa too).  I'm worried that Karah's junk will turn into Pneumonia again (it sounds kind of like it did last year before the bout with Pneumonia).

Yesterday was a strange day...  I am still talking to Charlie, exchanging bits of history getting to know one another and it's nice.  I can see why Mom loved him.  I got a little frustrated last night, because even with exchanging all these bits of info... there will be things I will forget to tell him that don't seem important until he doesn't know (does that even make sense).  

G took the news really well, and agreed with me that I should tell the others face to face.  They will need reassurance and the best way to give that to them is to do it face to face.

On another weird twist I called my Dad yesterday.  Tessa wanted to talk to him.  It was a brief conversation... I think she just needed to hear his voice.  He told me that my emails woke him up and he is going to do better.  I told him I will believe it when I see it.  The little girls wouldn't talk to him... and I didn't make them.  They don't know who he is and that is due to his lack of contact.

I didn't tell him about Charlie... two reasons
1.  I really don't think it's any of his business.  No disrespect intended towards him, but Charlie is my biological father and I want a relationship with him.
2.  I don't want him to have a sudden interest in the girls and me just to compete with Charlie.  You know marking his territory type thing.  

Do I think he is actually going to change???  No, absolutely not.  I think he feels bad and a little lonely because it's Christmas time so he wants to make an effort right this minute.  I think within a month or two (if not sooner) he will drift back out of our lives.  Time will tell and if he is really sorry and wants to be involved only time will tell that too.... 

Well off to the doctor with Tessa and then home to hopefully get some sewing done....

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